“A bee is never as busy as it seems; it’s just that it can’t buzz any slower.”
― Kin Hubbard
“Peace has its victories no less than war, but it doesn’t have as many monuments to unveil.”
― Kin Hubbard
“If capital and labor ever do get together it’s good night for the rest of us.”
― Kin Hubbard
“Nobody ever forgets where he buried the hatchet.”
― Kin Hubbard
“Fun is like life insurance; the older you get, the more it costs.”
― Kin Hubbard
“Nothing is as irritating as the fellow who chats pleasantly while he’s overcharging you.”
― Kin Hubbard
“The hardest thing is to take less when you can get more.”
― Kin Hubbard
“Don’t knock the weather; nine-tenths of the people couldn’t start a conversation if it didn’t change once in a while.”
― Kin Hubbard
“Where ignorance is bliss it’s foolish to borrow your neighbor’s newspaper.”
― Kin Hubbard
“Honesty pays, but it doesn’t seem to pay enough to suit some people.”
― Kin Hubbard
“The world gets better every day – then worse again in the evening.”
― Kin Hubbard
“Of all the home remedies, a good wife is best.”
― Kin Hubbard
“Nobody kicks on being interrupted if it’s by applause.”
― Kin Hubbard
“Some folks can look so busy doing nothing that they seem indispensable.”
― Kin Hubbard
“There is no failure except in no longer trying. There is no defeat except from within, no really insurmountable barrier save our own inherent weakness of purpose.”
― Kin Hubbard
“It’s the good loser who finally loses out.”
― Kin Hubbard
“Getting talked about is one of the penalties for being pretty, while being above suspicion is about the only compensation for being homely.”
― Kin Hubbard
“A good listener is usually thinking about something else.”
― Kin Hubbard
“If you haven’t seen your wife smile at a traffic cop, you haven’t seen her smile her prettiest.”
― Kin Hubbard
“An optimist is a fellow who believes what’s going to be will be postponed.”
― Kin Hubbard
“It’s going to be fun to watch and see how long the meek can keep the earth once they inherit it.”
― Kin Hubbard
“Boys will be boys, and so will a lot of middle-aged men.”
― Kin Hubbard
“No one can feel as helpless as the owner of a sick goldfish.”
― Kin Hubbard
“There’s no secret about success. Did you ever know a successful man who didn’t tell you about it?”
― Kin Hubbard
“When a fellow says, ‘It ain’t the money but the principle of the thing,’ it’s the money.”
― Kin Hubbard
“Nobody can be as agreeable as an uninvited guest.”
― Kin Hubbard
“We would all like to vote for the best man but he is never a candidate.”
― Kin Hubbard
“All the world loves a good loser.”
― Kin Hubbard
“There is nothing so aggravating as a fresh boy who is too old to ignore and too young to kick.”
― Kin Hubbard
“Live so that you can at least get the benefit of the doubt.”
― Kin Hubbard
“Kindness goes a long ways lots of times when it ought to stay at home.”
― Kin Hubbard
“The safe way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket.”
― Kin Hubbard
“Nobody ever grew despondent looking for trouble.”
― Kin Hubbard
“Men are not punished for their sins, but by them.”
― Kin Hubbard
“It ain’t a bad plan to keep still occasionally even when you know what you’re talking about.”
― Kin Hubbard
“As to those who hoard gold and silver and spend it not in God’s path, give them, then, the tidings of a painful agony: on a day when these things shall be heated in hell-fire, and their foreheads, and their sides, and their backs shall be branded therewith.”
― Kin Hubbard
“Next to a circus there ain’t nothing that packs up and tears out faster than the Christmas spirit.”
― Kin Hubbard
“The only way to entertain some folks is to listen to them.”
― Kin Hubbard
“There are two ways to handle a woman, and nobody knows either of them.”
― Kin Hubbard
“The fellow that agrees with everything you say is either a fool or he is getting ready to skin you.”
― Kin Hubbard
“It used to be that a fellow went on the police force when everything else failed, but today he goes in the advertising game.”
― Kin Hubbard
“It’s pretty hard to tell what does bring happiness; poverty and wealth have both failed.”
― Kin Hubbard
“Classical music is the kind we keep thinking will turn into a tune.”
― Kin Hubbard
“Being an optimist after you’ve got everything you want doesn’t count.”
― Kin Hubbard
“It isn’t enough for you to love money – it’s also necessary that money should love you.”
― Kin Hubbard
“If there’s anything a public servant hates to do it’s something for the public.”
― Kin Hubbard
“Now and then an innocent man is sent to the legislature.”
― Kin Hubbard
“Lack of pep is often mistaken for patience.”
― Kin Hubbard
“It is pretty hard to tell what does bring happiness; poverty and wealth have both failed.”
― Kin Hubbard
“Some fellows get credit for being conservative when they are only stupid.”
― Kin Hubbard
“Bargain… anything a customer thinks a store is losing money on.”
― Kin Hubbard
“The fellow that owns his own home is always just coming out of a hardware store.”
― Kin Hubbard
“A loafer always has the correct time.”
― Kin Hubbard
“If some people didn’t tell you, you’d never know they’d been away on a vacation.”
― Kin Hubbard
“No woman can be handsome by the force of features alone, any more that she can be witty by only the help of speech.”
― Kin Hubbard
“Every once in a while someone without a single bad habit gets caught.”
― Kin Hubbard
“Lots of folks confuse bad management with destiny.”
― Kin Hubbard
“It’s what a fellow thinks he knows that hurts him.”
― Kin Hubbard
“The worst feature of a new baby is its mother’s singing.”
― Kin Hubbard
“Nobody works as hard for his money as the man who marries it.”
― Kin Hubbard
“Universal peace sounds ridiculous to the head of an average family.”
― Kin Hubbard
“A grouch escapes so many little annoyances that it almost pays to be one.”
― Kin Hubbard
“A lot of Thanksgiving days have been ruined by not carving the turkey in the kitchen.”
― Kin Hubbard
“I don’t look for much to come out of government ownership as long as we have Democrats and Republicans.”
― Kin Hubbard
“After a fellow gets famous it doesn’t take long for someone to bob up that used to sit by him in school.”
― Kin Hubbard
“I’ll say this for adversity: people seem to be able to stand it, and that’s more than I can say for prosperity.”
― Kin Hubbard
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